A threesome is one of the most popular sexual fantasies worldwide, and for good reason. It involves lots of contact, lots of attention, and lots of novelty
However, turning a threesome from fantasy into reality requires preparation. On the emotional side, it’s important to discuss the basics of a threesome beforehand, how to handle challenging feelings, and how to find the third person.
It also requires practical preparation! Compared to sex with a partner, threesome sex isn’t always intuitive. It helps to look at some threesome setups. While you can get inspiration from ethical porn sites, consider this your basic guide to threesome sex positions.
Grab your lube, gather your lovers… and let’s get started.
The Trio
Just like foreplay, but with three people. Essentially, this is group making out, where you explore each other’s bodies with your hands and mouths… without penetration yet. This is a great time to explore mutual masturbation, touching yourself while touching each other. Toys work great here, for stimulating yourself or your lovers.
The Daisy Chain
This is oral sex in a chain, a sexual version of the human centipede. Everyone goes down on someone, and everyone gets something in return. A perfect loop of satisfaction.
The Coach
If your team enjoys sexual quirks and role-playing, this one’s for you. Two people are involved in penetration, while the third person (“the coach”) gives commands. If you’re the third person, you can use phrases like “good,” “just like that,” or “you’re doing great.”
If you’re a more Dom-like “coach,” you can make this part of your role. Think about phrases like:
- Do exactly as I show you.
- Watch me do it the right way.
- Don’t stop until I say so.
This is a good time to mention consent. As with all kinks, make sure all parties agree to this kind of play before engaging.
Doggy & Kitty
In this position, one person sits at the edge of the bed, receiving oral sex from a partner. Simultaneously, the oral sex partner is penetrated from behind in a doggy style. Teamwork makes the dream work!
Two-in-One
Once again, everyone has a role, and everyone gets pleasure. One partner lies flat, enjoying penetrative sex. Meanwhile, the other partner sits on their face, receiving oral sex.
The Eiffel Tower
This is similar to Doggy & Kitty, but with the middle person on all fours. They give oral sex to one partner while being penetrated from behind in a doggy style. High-five! Pleasure reaches new heights.
Double Penetration
I consider double penetration as a basic threesome position, but know that it is quite advanced, especially for the receiver with a vulva.
In this position, the partner with a vulva is on top, engaging in vaginal penetration. Simultaneously, another partner penetrates their anus from behind. Communicate a lot before trying this position: it’s a common fantasy for vulva owners, but everyone needs to move slowly when getting into it.
Additional pro tips: use plenty of lube, especially for anal penetration. This position often works best if only one partner thrusts while the other stays still—it will be more pleasurable for the receiver. Finally, avoid double dipping! That is, no switching from anal to vaginal penetration. Either save this for the grand finale or thoroughly clean your penis/toy if you’ve inserted it anally.
PS: If you’re new to anal sex, here’s an article on how to train for it.
Not Ready for a Threesome Yet? Hint… Fantasy Threesomes
This is a great way to start turning your fantasies into reality. In this position, there are still only two of you… but you’re using props and imagining a third person is there.
Blindfold your partner and strategically use your mouth and fingers to create the illusion of another person. Lube is your co-pilot: it will help you achieve this creative role-play. Here are a few ways to do this:
- Apply lube to your fingers to mimic the sensation of another tongue. While you go down on your partner, use your fingers to caress their nipples or neck, imitating licking.
- Cover your hands in lube, then get into a 69 position—with you on top. If your partner has a penis, press it with your hands as they push down on you (making it feel like vaginal sex).
